Words the Cast of Ronin Warriors Would Never Say

Ryo: Man, I really suck at this leader business.

(running down the street, screaming his head off.) HELP!!! THERE’S A FLOATING HEAD AFTER MEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!

You want me to jump into the volcano? ARE YOU FUCKING NUTS?!

Sage: For the last time. I AM NOT A GIRL!!!

(battling, sees pretty girl, stops, wolfwhistles.) YO BABY!!!

How do you meditate?

Cye: (struggling.) NO! DON’T MAKE ME GO IN THE WATER!!! I’M SCARED!!!

Guys, I’m opening a seafood restaurant.

OK, Ryo, I’ll help you fight Talpa. Just as soon as I’m done playing this video

game!

Rowen: Hey! I can fly! (smacks into telephone pole.) Ow.

0+0 =? Damn. I really need a calculator!

Sage, with that hair, you look like a girl.

Kento: Who stole my dictionary?!

(at restaurant.) I would like a small salad please.

Guys, before we attack we should think this through

Mia: What the hell was I thinking with this outfit? (rips outfit) There much better! (catcalls.)

(computer freezes.) @$%@#^&@^&*&%$#!@#$!!!!!! (trust me you don’t want to know what Mia is saying to the computer!)

(this is when Mia’s grandfather died and she was trying to figure out the poem.) Damn it! Why couldn’t Grandfather just translate this fucking poem like any other normal person would!

Yulie: Guys, I’m moving to France, so I won’t be around to bug you anymore.

(covers his nose after the Ronins finish a battle.) Damn, what the hell reeks?

(comes toward White Blaze with an electric razor.) Here, kitty, kitty, kitty!

Ryo: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! BLAZE!!!!!!

Anubis: (just took the Ancient’s place. Looks down at himself.) I look like a girl!

Being the Ancient’s replacement is a great job. You get to wear this dress, you get this cool stick, your own survival kit, you get to save the Ronins’ asses constantly, and you don’t get paid!

Hm, what’s in this little bag right here?

Cale: Master, you need a hair cut!

(getting ready to attack Sage, then stops.) Uh, what time is it?

Sage: (looks at watch) 3:30

Cale: Shit! I’m late to my Psychiatrist’s Appointment! (runs off leaving Sage confused.)

Sage: Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.

Dais: (singing.) Jingle bells, Talpa smells, Badamon was sent to jail! Mia Koji had an affair with one of the Ronin Whelps!

Ronins: Shut up, Dais!

Hm, I should see if I can get a job as that Captain Hook in that new Peter Pan movie.

(looking at self in mirror.) What the fuck am I doing wearing this eyepatch?!

Sekhmet: (gets snake thrown down shirt. Starts jumping around, trying to get it out.)

AUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHH! THERE’S SOMETHING SLIMY GOING DOWN MY BACK!!!!

Cye: Gee, Sekhmet, I didn’t know you could dance!

Master, can I have a pet snake? Pleeeeeeeeeeeseeeeee?! (gets all whiny) Ooooooohhhh, look poison! Heehehehehehehehehehehehe! (think of a crazy person.)

Sekhmet: I’M NOT CRAZY!!!!!

Talpa: Has anyone see my bow ties? I need to do my hair before the Ronins come!

I’m not going to fight you, Ronins! I’m taking you to court! So give me my damn armor!

Hm. That Mia looks like a babe! Wonder how much the Ronins would want for her?

Ancient: In every life there is virtue, life, wisdom, justice, trust, piety, serenity, loyalty, and obedience. And in my life there is……. BOOZE!!!! (opens a quart of beer and guzzles it down.)

Sorry, I can’t help you today. I’m playing the Super Lottery!

If you keep getting your ass kicked, I won’t help you anymore!

White Blaze: Ryo, let’s be smart about this. Let’s attack when the Dynasty’s sleeping. We could sneak it, pour gasoline all over the castle, and torch the S.O.B!!!!!!

(sees Kayura for first time.) Mhmhmhmmm! You are one fine looking dame!

(whines.) I always have to carry someone! Why can’t anyone carry me!!!